Work in progress

 I am working on four little paintings for the Easter season this year, and I decided that today I wanted to share a work in progress blog. It is another year when I am so thankful for the promise and hope of Easter, so I have started these paintings, and they are very near completion. 

The paintings are being painted over an older work that had been damaged, and I love that they are making something beautiful out of something so torn. It seems fitting, don't you think? Maybe you can see in these pictures the crucifixion, resurrection, anointing with perfume, and unjust trial. A couple of the ideas are easier to see, I must admit. 

Today is a significant day for me to share torn paintings. Today I am remembering our third child, a son who died right after he was born too early. As you might remember, if you have been following my blog for very long, we lost our first three children to three different causes. Our third, Brock, died from an infection in my body that caused him to be born early, and nearly caused my death at the same time. Most years, I don't remember the date of his birthday (I understand that some of the medication I got at that time caused a blank spot in my mind for some things), but it seems my body remembers. Almost every year I have extraordinarily difficult days, both emotionally and physically, on and around his birthday. I have some scars that are mostly hidden, I guess. 

I do remember that, particularly after Brock was born, the Easter service at church was so powerfully meaningful to me. I can remember where I was sitting in the service, and I can remember some of the emotion of that morning as if it were yesterday. We were still in shock, and we were grieving our third child and wondering whether we would ever have children here on earth. Yet, the joy and HOPE of that Easter, celebrating Jesus' victory over the grave, overwhelmed my sorrow. 

As of yet, I am unsure how I will finish these little works. I have considered grouping all four into one presentation somehow, or mounting each small work individually, or maybe not keeping all four together if they seem to work better separately. One thing about those decisions is that what appeals to me may not appeal to someone else, so in some respects, it would be good to keep the presentation details flexible so that they can be changed down the road. And, at least for today, that seems fitting too. My broken story, though beginning to be made beautiful, is still not ready to be presented in it's finished form. My scars still show here and there, and the story is not yet quite done. I, too, am a work in progress. 

Looking forward to celebrating the joy and victory of this year's Easter,

Coram Deo,

Brenda